"Ender's Game" by Orson Scott Card

First of all, I appologize for the lateness of this post. When I got around to writing it, my internet was down so I couldn't post it. Anyway, now onto the review of "Ender's Game."

I chose this book because I saw the movie and really enjoyed it. I thought it had a very thought provoking plot, and I had always heard good things about the book. 

I'm glad that I saw the movie before I read the book. I feel like having seen the movie first, I am still able to enjoy it. It is, of course, very different from the book and missing several plot elements - so I feel that if I had read the book first, I would not have been as pleased with the film. This way, however, I am still able to enjoy both. Because I did very much enjoy the book also. 

There were some things about this book that made it a little difficult for me. I couldn't think too much about the age of the children. It made me mad when I would stop and think about how the government had stolen their childhood from them, and the emotional, mental, and physical pressures they were putting on such young kids. But at the same time, that is the point. That is a key part to carrying out the overall objective of the book. The issues addressed would not have been so impactful had these things happened to an adult. 

One of the little things I really liked in the book was the description of anger. I thought it painted an excellent picture when he described Peter's anger as cold, as opposed to Bonzo, whose anger was hot. I am a sucker for good verbal descriptions and I thought this was one perfect. It made perfect sense to me, though I had never thought of attaching temperature measurements to anger before. It really helped to illustrate Peter, and help the reader understand him a little more - even though he was not present in that situation. 

Another thing that stuck with me that I have kind of been thinking about now that I'm finished with the book, is the role that all three Wiggin children played in the safety and well-being of the earth. All three were born to "save the world," but the government only focused on Ender's ability to be a military leader. In the end, however, it was all three of them who created the new and better world. While Ender was fighting the war in space, Peter and Valentine were fighting the war on earth. It was Peter and Valentine's writings and influence that changed the world. In the end, all Ender had done was destroy a race that no longer posed a threat to mankind. Peter and Valentine faced the real threat, which was the one mankind posed against itself. I like, however, that in the end, Ender was able to make a meaningful difference. I liked the aspect of all three Wiggin children "fulfilling their destiny" - Peter in an impressive leadership position helping to maintain peace on earth, Valentine heading up the immigration to other planets and writing her philosophy, and Ender, as Speaker for the Dead. 

I really enjoyed this book, but what did you think? 

June-July Reading Dates

Hey everyone! Thanks for all your great input about "The Phantom Tollbooth."  I enjoyed seeing what you all thought about the book.

Our next read will be "Ender's Game" by Orson Scott Card.

The discussion for this book will start July 27th.  Happy reading! :)

"The Phantom Tollbooth" by Norton Juster

I love "Alice in Wonderland."  It is one of my favorite books.  I found "The Phantom Tollbooth" to be in a similar category as "Alice in Wonderland."  One of the things I particularly liked about "The Phantom Tollbooth" in contrast to "Alice in Wonderland" was the sense of purpose in Milo's journey.  Alice's only quest was to find The White Rabbit, which leads to a sort of senseless adventure, whereas Milo sets out to save the Princesses Rhyme and Reason - learning all sorts of things along the way.  By the end of his journey, Milo has a new appreciation for things he used to not care about...numbers, words, sounds, etc.  Milo's journey helps him (and us) to find the beauty in everything, particularly the small things.  It showed him (and us) just how much time we waste everyday doing nothing.  I loved at the end of the book when he realized he had been gone for only an hour and it says how he had never realized how much he could do in such a short time.  And on top of that, when it said he would like to go back, but he was too busy with all the things to do and see and hear right in his own world.

The quirky characters in this book were so fun and likable.  I felt instantly connected with Tock and grew very fond of the HumBug. I was very impressed with the creativity of Juster in coming up with all the characters; people who grow down instead of up, the terrible Dynne, the orchestra that plays the colors...the eccentric mix of people really made this book enjoyable.

Juster's use of words was also very impressive - and very entertaining.  One example that comes immediately to mind is the Which/Witch.  The play on words in this book was very clever.

I think this book is an excellent read for people of all ages.  It has that fun, whimsical feel of "Alice in Wonderland" for children but is also equipped with plenty humor for the educated adult.  I thoroughly enjoyed this read.

What did you think?  

May - June Reading Dates

This month I will be reading The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster. 

I will post my review, and the discussion will start, on June 8th. 

Happy reading! 

"The Railway Children" by E. Nesbitt

I haven't got a very long review for this book, but let me share my thoughts with you.

I chose this book because it is one that I read when I was younger...well, started reading.  I never finished it and I figured that now was as good a time as ever.  I was wrong, back when I started it would have been a much better time. This book is clearly written for a younger audience and so I found that rather than enjoying it - I just sort of spent a lot of time scoffing at it.

The main thing that sticks out in my head is the three children's uncanny ability for saving people. I don't think I have ever actually saved a person's life before, but in the span of a year these kids saved a baby from a fire, an entire train load of people from crashing into an avalanche, and a boy in a red jersey from dying alone in a tunnel.  It's pretty amazing...and unrealistic.

It's a cute enough story about children with good intentions and has a nice happy ending, but it was little too perfectly ironic for me.

What did you think?

"The Secret Life of Bees" by Sue Monk Kidd

I quite enjoyed this book.  I saw the movie several years ago and remembered liking it, so I was excited to read the book.  I was surprised at some of the important plot devices I had forgotten about from the movie and was glad to be able to revisit this story.

One of the things I liked most about this book was the analogies Kidd used to help with visualizations and the beautiful way she was able to describe things and make you feel and understand completely.
Phrases like: "A girl could get lost on twenty-eight acres.  She could open a trap door and disappear."
"The first week at August's was a consolation, a pure relief.  The world will give you that once in a while, a brief time-out; the boxing bell rings and you go to your corner, where somebody dabs mercy on your beat up life."
And "It was the in-between time, before day leaves and night comes, a time I've never been partial to because of the sadness that lingers in the space between going and coming."
One thing I have always admired in writers is their ability to paint bright and vivid pictures with their words.

When I was in high school, I took an advanced drama class where we talked a little bit about script analysis.  One thing we were told to look for in a script was what is called a "spine line."  This is essentially the one line in the script that can summarize the entire theme of the play.  If I had to choose a spine line for The Secret Life of Bees, I would say it is when August states, "Every little things wants to be loved."
We see this is her instructions to send love to the bees, of course, but we see it more prominently in Lily.  The entire story truly revolves around Lily's need and desire to be loved.  It reached it's peak, I think, in that moment when she declares herself "unlovable" because of what happened to her mother.

Another thing that stuck out to me was when Lily said: "I don't mean to be a bad person.  I just can't seem to help it.  I do all the wrong things..."
How many of us have felt this way?  I know I have.  There have been times in my life where I get overwhelmed and feel like I can't do anything right.  I get frustrated when things don't go the way I want them to or think they should.  And although it was not her immediate response, I felt what August said at the end of the chapter was a powerful reply.
"There is nothing perfect.  There is only life."

I thought this was a beautiful story of love and forgiveness - particularly forgiving yourself, which I think is sometimes harder than forgiving others.  I hope you all enjoyed this book as much as I did.  Let me know what you thought!

March - April Reading Dates

The next pick for our book club is "The Secret Life of Bees" by Sue Monk Kidd.

                                

The discussion post for "The Secret Life of Bees" will go up April 6th, so be sure to have read it by then, so you can share your thoughts :)

After that, our next read will be "The Railway Children" by E. Nesbit.

                                

We will plan to have this book finished by April 27th.

Happy reading!

"Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov

I want to start by saying I worry that some of you are hesitant to read this book because A) the title has a swear, B) it doesn't apply to you because you don't and won't have sex before marriage anyway or C) you're already married. And that's fine, but I think it's a real shame to pass this book up for those reasons. I too, will never have premarital sex, but as a friend told me "just pretend they're talking about making out instead." And really, sex isn't the only tool to getting a man and Sherry Argov addresses so many other things.  This is not a book about sex. Also, there's lots in here about keeping a relationship interesting and strong. The principles in this book are still worth learning no matter your moral or marital status.

The most important thing I gained from this book was that a woman always needs to put herself first. The way to win or keep a man is not by catering to his every wish. This is something I have struggled with in relationships. This book was a HUGE eye opener to me. Sadly, I have to admit I have been a "nice girl."

I don't have any sort of chapter-by-chapter analysis of this book like I did the last. I can say, however, that I thoroughly enjoyed "Why Men Love Bitches," and I learned a lot. I have always been that girl who cancels things to wait for a call, drops everything when he wants or needs me, and exhausts all my time and energy into pleasing him. Sure - I thought that's what guys like/wanted. So yeah, this book was a huge newsflash for me. I have A LOT to work on. 

I think it is so important for girls to remember to put themselves first. Halfway through reading this book, I found myself in a situation with a guy I quite liked. He seemed to really like me too - he flirted, he texted, he walked me to my car - but I kept hearing rumors that he was already in a relationship. In the end, because of what I'd read in this book, I was able to confront the situation and let him know that I would not be treated like that. The ties were severed and I felt fine. Actually, I felt great. I didn't feel any loss because I wasn't really losing anything.  I was able to keep my self respect and avoid a lot of wasted time and needless heartache.  The key to happiness in or out of relationships is remembering that you don't need a man. You need to be strong and happy on your own. And that makes a world of difference.

It is so important to take care of yourself, mentally, physically, emotionally, financially...If you know who you are and what you expect from yourself, it is easier to know what you need in a partner.  Don't waste your time on anyone who sees you as free time, a pass time or a one time.  Stick to your guns, lay down the law and do what is best for you.  Don't compromise your happiness just because you are lonely.  Get a cat.

This book was so empowering for me and has definitely changed the way I will act around guys - and even myself.

Let me know what you thought!

"The Four Loves: An Exploration of the Nature of Love" by CS Lewis

"We need others physically, emotionally, intellectually; we need them if we are to know anything, even ourselves."


This quote was the first of MANY that I underlined for future reference.  For me, there were so many beautiful moments to this book.  CS Lewis has such a gift for articulating feeling into words.  I found this book to be very informative, and interesting.  However, it was definitely one of those books that I had to give my undivided attention if I wanted to get anything out of my reading for the day.  Sometimes it was like a textbook, where you have to read the same sentence six times before you internalize it.  And that is to say nothing against CS Lewis, as I think him to be a brilliant writer - his style is just so different from what we are used to today, that it took my full focus to really digest what I was reading.  But overall, I really enjoyed this book.

So now onto the more specific, breakdown...

In the introduction, Lewis says:

"I still think that if all we mean by our love is a craving to be loved, we are in a very deplorable state."

This comment stuck with me for several reasons.  First off - how true! It is not enough in life to want only for others to love us.  True joy in love comes from the ability and opportunity to love others.  But then, secondly, I thought about how very common it is for us to experience "a craving to be loved" over a natural love.  I would by lying if I said I had never been in this position.  The sad truth is that it happens every time I watch a chick-flick.  At the end of the movie when the heroine finally gets the guy and the camera does a slow zoom out of them kissing - my first thought is always "Ugh! I just want a man!"  There is honestly never a moment when I think about the love that I do have in my life or a second where I take the time to be grateful for that love.  In those moments, I always think of the love I do not have, and how much I wish I had it.  I crave that perfectly scripted romantic comedy and somehow label that as love.

I am glad that Lewis put this comment so early on it the book.  It was very beneficial to me to make that discovery about myself in enough time to consciously be thinking of what I can do to better love as I went through this book.

We have to keep in mind though, that this "craving to be loved" is not unusual and we cannot be blamed or feel guilty for experiencing it.

"...our whole being by its very nature is one vast need..."

We must remember that Need-love is normal and one of the natural loves.  It is, however, when Need-love becomes the main, or only, love, that we have a problem.  We must be able to find a balance between all the loves - always striving for that God like love of Charity.

I loved how Lewis discussed the way human love deems itself God-like.

"Every human love, at its height, has a tendency to claim for itself a divine authority.  Its voice tends to sound as if it were the will of God Himself.  It tells us not to count the cost, it demands of us a total commitment, it attempts to over-ride all other claims and insinuates that any action which is sincerely done 'for love's sake' is thereby lawful and even meritorious."

How many of us have not known someone whose human love was like this?  I think we see it all the time, especially when young kids and teenagers claim they are in love.  This obsession with the idea of love drives them to believe it is power above all else and therefore, their actions are justified - even when we, and they, know them to be wrong.  I can't help but think of The Little Mermaid..."But Daddy, I love him!"  Ariel justified her disobedience with her love for the prince - as if it needed no other explanation and was not deserving of punishment.  I love The Little Mermaid as much as the next girl, but this is a prime example.

Lewis follows up this idea by saying:

"We may give our human loves the unconditional allegiance which we owe only to God...Then they will destroy us, and also destroy themselves.  For natural loves that are allowed to become gods do not remain loves.  They are still called so, but can become in fact complicated forms of hatred."



In the first chapter, Lewis expounds more on the dangers of harboring only Need-loves.  He states:

"...the Need-love...will not last longer than the need.  ...where Need-love is left unaided we can hardly expect it not to 'die on us' once the need is no more."

It is, therefore, important for us to enjoy and employ the other forms of love. In fact, most of the loves, in a sense, are Need-loves - for they need other loves to exist.  Lewis says of Affection:

"It is a Gift-love but it needs to be needed."

The chapter on Affection was one of my favorites.  To me, Affection seemed like such a pure and God-like love on its own, because...

"This warm comfortableness, this satisfaction in being together, takes in all sorts of objects. ...It ignores the barriers of age, sex, class and education."

What a beautiful thing! And how many of us can claim never to have felt this?  I think it manifests itself daily in friendships, or endearments towards neighbors, coworkers and peers - and this because...

"The especial glory of Affection is that it can unite those who most emphatically, even comically, are not [made for one another]; people who, if they had not found themselves put down by fate in the same household or community, would have had nothing to do with each other."

Affection can be given by anyone to anyone else.  It is the basis for all love....

"But Affection is often assumed to be provided, ready made, by nature; 'built-in,' 'laid-on,' 'on the house.'  We have a right to expect it.  If the others do not give it, they are 'unnatural.'"

We cannot force people to love us, and the unfortunate truth is that not everyone will.  We cannot expect them to.  Do you love everyone you come in contact with? Ideally, we would - in a perfect Christlike manner, but I will be the first to admit that I have fallen short in that area.  I do not have Affection for everyone I meet.

"For the very same conditions of intimacy which make Affection possible also - and no less naturally - make possible a peculiarly incurable distaste; a hatred as immemorial, constant, unemphatic, almost at times unconscious, as the corresponding form of love. ...The 'built-in' or unmerited character of Affection thus invites a hideous misinterpretation.  So does its ease and informality." 

We cannot allow this however to taint our desire or appreciation for Affection, as...

"Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our natural lives."

But...

"Affection produces happiness if - and only if - there is common sense and give and take and 'decency.' In other words, only if something more, and other, than Affection is added. ..If we try to live by Affection alone, Affection will 'go bad on us.'"



The next chapter was Friendship.  There were a lot of very interesting things I found in this particular chapter as well, the first being Lewis' idea that...

"...very few modern people think Friendship a love of comparable value or even a love at all."

This surprised me.  I have had the blessing in my life to experience friendships that can be described as no less than Love itself.  It seems odd to me that people would not consider Friendship to be love at all.  I identify more with "the Ancients," about whom Lewis said:

"To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue.  The modern world in comparison ignores it."

I still find the accusation of the modern world shocking.  For anyone who has experienced the true love of Friendship, you know that it cannot be ignored.  Though, I think Lewis has a point.  He lived in different times than we do now, but if you look at our own era - what real friendships still exist?  We do everything via technology.  Even this book club is online where we don't actually have to interact with one another. Today, the definition of Friendship seems to be whether or not someone follows you on online social networks.  And what a shame!  Because true, human, interactive friendships are some of the most powerful things I have ever experienced.  And, Lewis agrees when he states:

"...few value it because few experience it."

It is no less true today than when this book was written.  If anything, it is more true. Friendship is something we should all have the opportunity to experience, for, as Lewis put it...

"It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival."

Lewis labels Friendship as the most spiritual of the loves - calling it almost angelic - and I am inclined to agree.



The next chapter, Eros, I found less appealing than the others, and perhaps that is because I don't think I have ever personally experienced this kind of love.  I did however, find many part of Eros to be beautiful.  I loved when Lewis quoted Charles Williams who said:

"Love you? I am you."

That particular quote reminded me of my favorite novel "Wuthering Heights" by Emily Bronte, in which the character Cathy gives a stunning speech about her love for Heathcliff stating "I am Heathcliff!"

I loved when Lewis called Eros...

"...both pathetically and absurdly beautiful."

I find this to be true, especially in regards to some of his other musings.  For instance:

"...it is the very mark of Eros that when he is in us we had rather share unhappiness with the Beloved than be happy on any other terms."

"To meet the Beloved is to realize, 'We loved before we were born.'"

To me these things are simultaneously ridiculously pathetic and "absurdly beautiful."



The final chapter, Charity, was one that I am not sure I can do justice to.  So let me just share some of my favorite gems...

"Do not let your happiness depend on something you may lose. ...There is no safe investment.  To love at all is to be vulnerable.  Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. ...[however] Christ did not teach and suffer that we might become, even in the natural loves, more careful of our own happiness. ...If our hearts need to be broken, and if He chooses this as the way in which they should break, so be it."

"It is probably impossible to love any human being simply 'too much.'"

"There is of course a sense in which no one can give to God anything which is not already His; and if it is already His what have you given? But since it is only too obvious that we can withhold ourselves, our wills and hearts, from God, we can, in that sense, also give them."

"There is something in each of us that cannot be naturally loved. ...We can be forgiven, and pitied, and loved in spite of it, with Charity; no other way."

"By loving Him more than them we shall love them more than we now do."



I really thought this book was an excellent exploration of the human nature towards love and I hope that each of you have gained from it as much as I have.  Please add to the discussion by commenting below.  I look forward to reading what you took out of this book!

To end, I will quote once again, the brilliant CS Lewis...

"If anything in it is useful to you, use it; if anything is not, never give it a second thought."

February - March Reading Dates

Hello all! The first book I am working on is "The Four Loves" by CS Lewis.
           
                               

If you'd like to join in, I plan to be finished by March 2, 2014.  I will then have a post discussing my ideas and impressions about the book - and you can comment with yours :)

The next book I will be working on after "The Four Loves," will be "Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov.

                                 

The goal date for this book will be March 16, 2014.